its about fourty minutes away from year 2006. well. i guess i would consider it a rather life changing event i would say. something that happened in church. let me share with everyone reading..

ever year on the eve of new year we have this program in church to welcome and prepare us for the new year. this year, the theme was to give thanks for everything God has done and provided this year, and so seek forgiveness for sins we have done so that we can welcome the new year with a light heart.

well.. at this part where we are suppose to seek forgiveness, we were given a piece of red paper to write down some of the wrong things we have done. sins we want to confess to God and seek for his forgiveness. then there is this big bucket of red water, which is used to symbolise God's blood.. how he died for us to redeem our sins, and that we will be forgiven if we come to him to confess.

well.. i was indecisive.. should i write? what if someone sees and look down on me next time? nonetheless, i wrote down the sins i have committed.. and quickely covered it up. so everyone.. one by one. took the card and put in the bucket of red water, a sign to leave everything to God.
as i put the card into the bucket and saw the card immerse into the water, i was overwhelmed with emotions. i went back to my seat, and i prayed and i teared. i pray and i teared. i pray and i teared.

i saw how everyone put their card into the bucket. everyone. putting their sins to God. i thought of how God who is so great so wonderful and so almighty, yet use his blood to save us. i cried because i felt i have let Him down. i have sinned. on one hand it was the shame and the guilt of the sins i have committed. the things where u hope no one will ever no u commit. the kind u shy away in shame. yet on the other hand it was the almighty. who took my sins away. i felt so weak. so exposed in front of God. and wow. he is willing to forgive whatever i have done! i was just overwhelmed by all these. i just couldnt control myself.

it changed my perspective. my actions ( i m sure it will).. everything.
it was sort of a life changing experience for me. renewing me for the new year ahead.

that aside. i felt really bad for making my tuition teacher angry. cause i ponned tuition again. my fault actually. its like the third time i messed up her timing.. and she was really angry. sigh. i seek forgiveness. from her and from God.

anyways. i m determined to make the coming year ahead different. =)
happy new year. and have a blessed year ahead..